Being kind in conflict
My Religion is very simple, my religion is kindness.
Dalai Lama
In the world today we see ever-increasing judgment, irrational hatred, and conflict. The television, social media, and even in our workplaces we find intolerance and unnecessary conflict. The wide range of ideas presented to us seems to be creating a level of hatred that is never before known to us. There is an instinctual drive to compete for resources that lie deep in our genetic coding. We have the need to make sure that our particular set of DNA moves forward to the future. The need to feed, clothe, and house our offspring makes us competitive for resources needed to help them survive, making sure "we" have the provisions needed to move our genetics forward. This competition is natural but clearly out of balance in today’s world.
The need for resources is preyed upon by marketing professionals in that they speak to those needs in a way that is manipulative and dangerous. If we don't have the biggest, baddest of whatever they are advertising, we will surely be left behind in the evolutionary process. It is seriously the goal of these people to make us feel as if we will not belong if we do not buy into what it is they are selling.
This need causes the competitive nature of all people to come out and want for more. It is easy enough to see. Look at the complaints of those that have much and the seriously low standards of living of those that are unable to gain access to resources. The seriously impaired do not have the ability to take care of their simple living needs. yet some would complain that they don't deserve the small amount they get. There are those that believe that they "deserve" more than others and work to manipulate systems to gain access to more than they need.
So what is the resolution?
Kindness.
You can not stand against those that you feel kindness toward. When living in kindness you understand that everyone is working toward the same goal: to provide for their family and to promote their lineage to move forward.
Knowing this, it is much easier to get along. Kind words are not usually met with argument; Judgement and accusation are. Let go of what it is that you believe about who deserves your kindness. Reach out with the intent to understand. Try to look at each person you meet as valuable and worthy of this one small thing; Kindness. If you will take to time to get to know those you are competing against you will see that they too are just people working on gaining resources to survive.
We are all truly just one job loss, illness, or death away from where ever "those people" are. being kind is easier when we consider the similarities instead of the differences. There is enough for everyone.
See how your world changes.
If you need support to learn why you are not able to be kind, counseling can help
Karen Van Acker LPC LLC
