Space for everyone
Ever feel like you are crowded by all of the "others" out there?
Everyone seems to have an opinion of how things should be, or how you in particular should live your life. Opinions everywhere and the ever present space invaders. People who have no boundaries or at least cant see that they are invading yours. It can feel like you are unable to be your self without upsetting everyone around you. Just breathing can cause some people to not like you. So what is the answer?
Letting go of expectations of being accepted.
Wait, what?
That is right. you have to let go of what others think of you.
This is difficult for some of us because we have been raised in a family or culture that dictates the need to conform to the expectations of others. The trouble is that it is impossible to conform to everyone and everything. Believing that there is one way to do it "right" has caused a lot of people to need medication. Giggle
The truth about feeling safe and sane is that we must learn who we really are and accept ourselves fully. Sounds easy right? yeah not so much... It takes a concerted effort on each individual’s part to look inward and understand themselves fully. It is nearly impossible to do it alone also.
Find someone that you can trust to tell you the truth. Ask them to serve as an advisor on your personal board of directors and give you feedback on the decisions in your life. Goodness, that is a big job. It can be a big help if you can let down your protective walls and get feedback from another person on yourself. Others can see things we ourselves can not.
Getting to know one’s self completely and accepting the self just as you are, is the most freeing thing anyone can do. Letting go of the expectations of others and allowing yourself the freedom to just be allows us to let others do the same.
Can you imagine a world where we can just be ourselves?
If you are looking for a counselor to help you through the self-discovery.
I am here to help
Karen Van Acker LPC LLC
Counseling in Salem Oregon
